Tuesday, December 6, 2011

On the same boat

This is truly the season for eating and parties.  And I am glad that I already have one on my list.  Our high school batch's Christmas party.  And I was told that there is yet another one before the year ends.

Well, I must admit that I already miss not only being with people but also talking to people.  Admittedly, too, I got another invite for a cup of coffee the day after the christmas party.  I did not resist the invitation because I know that this friend of mine just came from a trip to the Holy Land and there are a lot of stories to tell.

But in the midst of all the topics, they could not avoid but ask me every now and then about my sickness, how I deal with it, what happens with this and that, what is not there that used to be, what is there that isn't supposed to be and all that stuff that sometimes you cannot imagine one might ask.

Most of the time, the questions and the stories run from direct experiences of people.  If not, it's something someone said, or someone heard from someone.  The trail could be long and sometimes not precise.  

But still, I don't really mind these things.  I actually think that with these questions and stories, I learn about my situation.  And the more I learn about my situation, the more I learn how to adjust myself and accept those things that in the first place I thought was only happening to me.

It pays to know that I could be in the same boat, I AM in the same boat, and I am in the same boat as someone has been.  This makes me feel less alone.  And that somehow, these things that happen to me is really what happens to someone who has cancer.

The best example I could give today is the taste buds.  I learned from one of my friends that her dad also had gone through what I am going through right now.  I lose my taste buds for a few days and gain it back slowly, almost in proportion in gaining back my strength.  She told me that her dad once told her that he couldn't taste the salty flavor of the food, then asked if I ever experienced that.  I said yes and told my story about how I cried over a breakfast of tocino and couldn't eat because it doesn't taste anything at all.

Upon learning about my friend's dad, I don't think I would cry over that tocino again.  At least I know that it happens to all of us who has cancer.  It makes me feel less alone and that someone has been there, tasted that.  

Now, I am brave enough to tell of my ordeal through this blog, twitter and other social networks not because I wanted sympathy.  I didn't start this blog to whine about the pain, but rather to make people know that we can fight it.  I didn't start this to scare but rather, to make you see that there is hope even after all the pain.

I just wanted to be an inspiration.

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